The yuletide should be filled with good cheer and reunions with family and friends.

Yet many will be mired in the holiday blues.

Some people stress over picking the perfect gift or throwing the perfect Christmas party.

Others, in tight financial circumstances, dread the bills that the holidays can generate.

Some are depressed because it will be the first Christmas spent without a deceased loved one.

Holiday depression is more widespread than many realize, said Brent Olean, a licensed clinical social worker and owner of Transformation Counseling Center, 314 Thomson Drive, Cranberry Township.

“(People who are depressed) are more common than not at this point in our lives,” said Olean. “The older we are, the more people have the holiday blues. It hits middle-aged folk.”

Olean said, “The younger kids are so wrapped up in (holidays). When you are 21 or 22, fresh out of the house, you are creating new traditions.

“When you are 40 or whatever middle age is considered these days,” he said. “you have had a lot of life, but you've had a lot of losses as well. We dwell on the things that we've lost.”

Olean said he notices the change in some of his clients around October and it goes through the New Year's Day.

Those with addictive personalities, he said, begin to abuse again whether it's drugs or gambling or drinking.

“Depression at this time of year is very common,” agreed Dr. Elizabeth Krause, a psychologist who runs a practice called Malec, Herring & Krause with two of her female colleagues in Mars.

“The loss of a loved one is one of the most common predictors of holiday blues, I think, in our practice,” Krause said.

“Another factor is anyone with personal health issues or crises is going to be vulnerable, and the third scenario that makes people vulnerable and one of the most common ones is financial issues,” she said.

“Seniors come to mind as one of the most vulnerable groups for all three of those scenarios,” Krause said.

The Rev. Randall Forester, pastor of St. Paul's Community Church on Route 268 outside Chicora, thinks enough people are suffering that he scheduled a special service at his church.

Called the Longest Night or Blue Christmas service, Forester said the service was on Friday, the day with the shortest amount of daylight of the year and the winter solstice, and was open to anyone.

Forester said the service lasted less than an hour and consisted of prayers, songs and a candle-lighting ceremony.

“I light a candle, the first is to lost loved ones. I ask anyone present can they name who they are there for,” said Forester. He added the other candles are lighted representing other troubles and those present were asked to share their situations.

“The fifth candle I light is the Christ candle,” Forester said. “Even if he is hard to find we must look for God in the midst of sorrows.”

After the service, Forester said he and church elders were available to talk one-on-one with those who want to.

“We're reaching out to people who are feeling isolated in their feelings,” he said.

“Some people are feeling this way, but they are seeing on TV that it's time to laugh, time for warm and fuzzy feelings,” he said. “For those who are in depression or near depression, it can be very hard. We tell them it's alright to be unhappy or angry with God.”

Dr. Donna Korczyk, a psychologist with a practice in Cranberry Township, said, “What I see mostly are people with holiday stress that can trigger depression. I see people with a lot of stress around the holidays. People who tend to get really depressed are those that have suffered a recent loss like a death or a divorce.

“The stress is caused by unrealistic expectations about how the holidays should be, and then when they can't live up to the unrealistic expectations, they feel depressed, they become self critical that they've come up short,” said Korczyk.

“It is sort of marketed that way,” Korczyk said. “It's a function of advertising really, the media puts out so many unrealistic portrayals of what holidays are supposed to be like that people try to live up to them.

“Or they have idealized memories of what it was in the past,” she said. “Or bad memories of what it was like growing up, and they have to make up for it now when they are adults.“It's 'We never celebrated Christmas and Dad was always drunk, but I'm going to make sure my Christmases are perfect,' Reality is never perfect.”“Just insisting that something should be a certain way is a clue to stop and check your expectations,” Korczyk said. “Who says it should be that way and what makes what they say right?”“People have these grand expectations for the holidays which, in the end, they always lose,” said Olean.“What's more important?” Olean asked. “To spend 14 hours in the kitchen preparing a meal that will be eaten in 20 minutes or spend 14 hours with your family and have a mediocre meal?”“Your priorities should be your marriage, children and family. Our priorities are getting messed up, by keeping up with the neighbors,” Olean said.Olean's comments were echoed by Pete Albert, clinical nurse specialist in mental health at VA Butler Healthcare.“People get stressed and they get tunnel vision and it's hard to see the options in your life,” Albert said.“The difference between a case of the holiday blues and depression is that the blues will eventually end, Krause said. “Holiday blues are temporary. They are specific to this period of time and then it lifts.“Depression is a much more serious condition. After the first of the year, if it lasts two weeks or more or the sufferer is withdrawing from social activities, it could be depression.”How does one recognize depression sufferers?Olean said, “They tend to isolate more; that's one tendency. They may sleep more. There's more drinking which exacerbates the problem. They may be irritable.”Sticking to a routine and avoiding overindulgence in holiday food and drink are good ways to avoid negative emotions, said Korczyk.“Don't give up on your healthy habits during the holidays,” Korczyk said. “Get enough sleep, and, as hard as it is, get some exercise. Eat in a healthy way. Avoid drinking too much alcohol because alcohol is a depressant. You may think it is going to make you feel better, but it will make you feel worse in the long haul.”Dr. Mary Jane Niebauer, lead psychologist at Butler VA Healthcare, agreed it is important for people to get enough rest and to eat healthy.Niebauer also recommended fighting the blues by “doing something that you know will cheer you up.”“I know that sounds very vague, but it's different for every person,” said Niebauer. “For me, it's playing with my kids. It could be going for a jog. The movie, 'A Christmas Story,' makes me laugh.”Set reasonable expectations, said Olean, don't feel like you have to have a gift for everyone or attend every party.“Slow it down and look at the blessings you do have in life,” he said.

It's a myth that suicide rates go up during the holidays, said Pete Albert, who is clinical nurse specialist in mental health and the suicide prevention coordinator at VA Butler Healthcare, 325 New Castle Road.“Suicide rates are highest in the spring. It does a disservice to people in that it focuses our attention on a time period that doesn't need it as much,” said Albert of the myth.Holiday depression, he said, is a short-term issue. “People who commit suicide have long-term issues,” he said.In his six years working with veterans both hospitalized and as outpatients at the Butler VA, Albert said he devises a safety plan with a veterans in 10 to 15 minutes. He said the plan can be used by anyone to identify if they are at risk for depression and suicide:Step 1: Define the symptoms. Are you not sleeping well? Are you feeling anxiety?Step 2: Take action on your own. Are there things you can do yourself to divert suicidal thoughts? Albert said activities could range from going to the gym, taking the dog for a walk or reading.Step 3: Get out and about. Get out among people, Albert said. Visit a neighbor. Have coffee with friends. Go to the mall to window shop.Step 4: Access your support system. Talk to your family, a minister, people who know you.Step 5: Seek professional help. Call your primary care physician, a psychologist, a social worker, even 911. Write their numbers down and keep them with you.Step 6: Make the environment safer. Take any guns out of the house. Give your medication, other than a one- or two-day supply, to a friend to hold.