Friends, family gather in Butler to remember those lost to suicide
Just as the weather in Butler’s Diamond Park fought between the sun and the rain before giving way to a golden Wednesday evening, dozens gathered to remind one another that no matter how much darkness manages to creep in, the light will always find its way.
The park was filled with friends and families of suicide victims for the annual Butler County Suicide Coalition’s remembrance rally. Pairs of shoes laid along the edge of the park’s fountain, each marked only with a gender and age, representing each person who died of suicide in the past year.
The event featured therapy dogs and access to mental health resources for attendees.
To start off this year, four speakers shared their own personal experiences with suicide and the resources they’ve found in the aftermath. While they spoke, sunlight descended on Butler’s downtown.
Linda and Gary Hundertmark, alongside their daughter, Megan Hundertmark, shared their experience in losing a son or brother to suicide. The family lost their son, Nathan, when he was a senior in college.
“We were like three people suddenly crossing into the middle of the ocean in a lifeboat and we held onto one another,” Linda Hundertmark said. “I often said that we were supposed to get ready for a graduation, not a funeral.”
The family brought a three-legged table to represent the family’s loss.
“The table has four legs, but when one leg is suddenly removed, the table loses its balance. But gradually, over time, the table learns how to stand on three legs. After being involved in classes, walks and discussions with other parents and siblings, we learned again to stand on three legs,” she continued.
She said since Nathan’s death, each member of the family has found new passions in life. Gary Hundertmark took up gardening, Megan Hundertmark finished her associate degree and Linda Hundertmark started painting rocks.
Jennifer Christy, another speaker, shared her own personal experience with suicidal ideation.
She said she had dealt with it since her teens, but it gripped her life in February. Luckily, she said she had the support network to get her through it.
“A wise friend told me during this time that, if you can’t take it day by day, then take it hour by hour. If you can’t take it hour by hour, then we’ll take it moment by moment together. She told me I didn’t need to promise her to live for a long time. I just need to promise to get to the next morning,” Christy said.
She shared with the group that she went to inpatient treatment for the third time this year, a fact she brought up to remind people that seeking the treatment you need does not make you crazy, but just someone who needs help.
“I was reminded that we all need a little extra help sometimes. I needed a reset and a medication adjustment, and I needed to be in an extra safe place for a little while. And that’s OK,” Christy said.
She encouraged everyone listening to help destroy the stigmatization of suicide by talking openly about their experiences with it.
After the speakers finished, Katie Doerr, with the suicide prevention hotline at the Center for Community Resources, presented a painting that read “Stay your story isn’t over” and passed out cards and pens. She asked everyone attending to pass on a message of love or hope that will be hung up alongside it.
The coalition is planning other events in September to connect with people and offer resources and community. As September is National Suicide Prevention Month, the coalition is making a push for awareness to people who otherwise might not know where to turn for help.
Upcoming events this month include a game night at Your Parent’s Basement on Sept. 19 and a movie night showing “Inside Out 2” at the Butler Area Public Library the evening of Sept. 27.
By the end of the event, as people turned in their cards, the rain had completely stopped and a faint rainbow could be seen from the park.
