Earth-shattering breaking news: Pennsylvania fails another health-related test. It seems that Pennsylvanians have a death wish.

It is no secret that Pennsylvania has long been one of the states mentioned when obesity problems are discussed, but our newest claim to fame would be how badly we have adapted to the dangers of smoking and other tobacco use.

Our stubborn streak over the ways we can put our lives in jeopardy extends from salads destroyed by French Fries to craft beer breweries on every corner, gun permits for knuckleheads who want to play tough guys in public parking lots and vehicle permits for ATV traffic for young and old to contend with on our public roads.

So, why not finish last when it comes to reporting how well we are doing with education and the attempt to curb the use of e-cigarettes, vaping and secondhand smoke? All these years after the surgeon general first ordered the warning about how tobacco and cigarettes in particular will kill you, we in Pennsylvania still are the gold standard for stupidity of using tobacco products.

Sixteen percent of Pennsylvania adults are smokers as are 7% of high school students.

Twenty-seven percent of high school students either smoke, chew, or vape. One in every four, aren’t we proud? Many states have taken the step of banning flavored cigarettes as a deterrent to stop young or new smokers, but we in Pennsylvania are way too smart to let someone interfere with our right to choke to death at an early age.

Some, in fact most states, have banned all forms of smoking in public places, but Pennsylvania’s Clean Air Act was passed in 2008 and has never been upgraded to include cigarettes or vaping. So, we are truly leaders in secondhand smoking as well.

Kudos to Philadelphia who, unlike Pittsburgh, has at least a partial local ban, which prohibits vaping. We even ignored the obvious opportunity when the casinos were allowed to reopen after the widest COVID-19 restrictions; we failed to continue the ban on smoking in the casinos.

You are probably more likely to die from being over-served on free liquor in the casinos than by inhaling poison gas from the smoker next to you anyway. Outside of death, is smoking really that costly to us? Costs for smoking-related health care in Pennsylvania are estimated at $6.8 billion annually. There are now 12.8 million people living in Pennsylvania. We are truly to be commended for our position on the right to die.

That is what we have fought wars over and why we need to fight over whether we should have write-in, no excuse ballots. Yes, sir. Let’s protect our rights to suffer, gag, choke and weeze. God Bless America.

— RV