Till Death Do Us Part
Newlyweds, while new to the marriage game, know what it takes to have a successful marriage.
“You're changing your name, figuring out how you are going to pay bills, it can be really stressful,” said Amy (Walker) Hatch, formerly of Sarver.
Amy and Caleb Hatch were married Nov. 3 at the Zion United Methodist Church and now live in Erie. Amy said one of the most important keys to a successful marriage is communication.
“I think communication and understanding how each spouse communicates is best,” said Amy. “Learning what they need, learning how they like to communicate, how they like to be responded to.”
Caleb also thinks communication is critical for a successful marriage.
“I'm finding it takes time to learn how to best listen to your spouse and respond in a way that she feels loved and valued; even if that is to just listen and not go looking to solve their problem,” Caleb said.
“Guys seem to naturally want to fix things, but often it seems a wife just wants to be heard and her thoughts valued,” Caleb said.
Leslie (Glasgow) Fabris, formerly of Butler, agrees with the Hatches.“My husband and I spend a lot of time together just communicating,” Fabris said.Fabris married her husband, Brandon Fabris, on Aug. 18 at Buhl Farm Park in Hermitage. The couple now lives in Akron, Ohio.Some couples said to remember that not every day will be perfect.“A successful marriage needs an understanding that not every day will feel fluffy and wonderful,” said Caleb.Crystal (Beals) and Travis Keene of Butler said working together through the tough times will make a marriage last.“We think it's important to have reasonable expectations,” said Crystal. “It's an adjustment when you merge two lives together. You have to embrace that and know what it takes work.”The Keenes were married on Aug. 4 in Las Vegas, then later had a reception at Alameda Park for extended family and friends.Many of the newlyweds spent time before their special day reading books and articles on marriage.“I have a real passion for marriage,” Leslie said. “I'm 29 and I think our generation saw our parents get divorced and now some of our friends, so I've taken the time to read books before getting married.”
The Fabrises and Hatches also have been completing devotionals with their spouses.“We are both Christians, both love God and both want to share his love with each other,” Amy said.Leslie said God and the Bible played a huge role in bringing her and her husband closer together.“A common theme in a lot of the books that we read and the Bible is that women need love and men need respect,” Leslie said.The Keenes also believe love and respect will help couples have lifelong marriages.“The keys to a successful marriage are appreciating each other and showing that appreciation to each other,” Crystal said.
Christopher Healey of Butler said a great way to show respect and appreciation is to say those three little words.“Always tell your spouse that you love them,” Healey said.Danielle and Christopher Healey of Butler were married May 5 at Covenant Presbyterian Church.The Healeys said before marriage can even be thought of, it's important to take the time to get to know each other.“You have to find a partner that is both a complimentary personality and who will challenge you to be your best,” Danielle said. “Find a person that you share common interests with so that you never have to work to have a bonding experience.”Many newlyweds' advice is to remember the famous wedding day vows, “for better or worse.”“We know there will continue to be rough days and arguments, but we'll come out stronger together because of it,” said Caleb. “We realize we didn't just choose each other on our wedding day, we continue to choose each other every day — even the tough ones.”
