This brief essay first appeared in the Oct. 7 Sunday bulletin of St. John the Evangelist/St. Wendelin Roman Catholic parishes of Butler. It is reproduced with the blessings of its author.— TAHThe Butler Golden Tornado football team is having a challenging year. If you don’t follow the team, check the scores from Friday night, you might think that the season has been a disaster.But there is more to it than that.I saw a post written by the Norwin High School Football Boosters after Norwin beat Butler 42-0 last Friday. It was in praise of the Butler coaches and players.After the game, first-year coach Eric Christy and the Butler team invited the Norwin team to come to midfield and thank God for the brotherhood of football and for the chance to compete. Butler has done this after every game this year.Norwin was blown away by this. Honestly, so am I.Coach Christy understands the intention of the game. He gets what it’s for.You want to win, sure, but your life isn’t counted by and good human beings don’t come from wins or losses. But they do come from being in the arena, doing your best, depending on others. Knowing you need them and they need you.Playing the game. By the rules. With respect. We have a coach in Butler who understands the intention of the game.The Gospel today is about marriage and divorce and adultery. It can be hard to hear. It can make people feel bad, unwelcome even, if they have gone through a marriage problem or break up.But you know, as I do, that some of the greatest, holiest people have been divorced, or gone through issues in their marriage.What God is really telling us today is that in marriage, we need to remember the intention of the game. Marriage is a gift from God because God saw that man was lonely. He wasn’t alone, God was there, animals were there, but he was lonely. He needed a partner. So God gave him one. God’s intention was that man be happy and fully himself. So He gave him a suitable partner.God didn’t do this so that everything would be perfect. But that man might be able to be who God made him to be, which is a person not focused on himself. God gave man someone to make sacrifices for. The intention is that husbands and wives give themselves away for the good of their spouse. That is what it is to be fully human.That is what it is to live as God created you to live. Just like in football, you want everything to go great. You want more wins than losses. But sometimes there will be lots of losses. If the intention is pure and true, those losses won’t destroy you. They will be another chance for you to sacrifice and suffer for the other, to play the game as it is intended to be played. To be who you are created to be.So the readings today are tough. But remember what they are really about. They are about God helping us to be most fully human, who we are made to be. Jesus showed us the way. He did what he did because he was all about us. He shows the example. God doesn’t want us trapped in the loneliness of self concern so he showed us how to be all about others. He gave us the great gift of marriage, as the root and wellspring of this true living. And he calls us to remember this intention, to step into the arena and give it all we’ve got.

Father Matt McClain is the pastor of St. John the Evangelist and St. Wendelin Roman Catholic parishes in Butler.