A call for an informal meeting last summer to start a PFLAG chapter in Butler attracted more than 20 attendees, many of whom set off from there to formally start a group to be a community for LGBT individuals.

PFLAG, or Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, is a nonprofit founded in 1973 to advocate for queer individuals. It now has chapters all over the U.S.

Lisa Quebedeaux, copresident of PFLAG Butler, was one of the people who gathered at Your Parents’ Basement in June 2024 with an interest in organizing a chapter in Butler. The group was formally established as a nonprofit in January, and Quebedeaux and the other board members are now working toward providing support groups and other activities for LGBT individuals and their families in the Butler area.

“It’s original intention was not to be for the LGBT. It was for the parents, to help them understand their kids who are queer,” Quebedeaux said of PFLAG. “That mission remains the primary work that a chapter like ours does, is offer support groups.”

PFLAG has its organizational meetings monthly, which take place at 7 p.m. the second Tuesday of each month at the YWCA Butler. They are open for anyone to attend to become acquainted with the group and its members.

Anna Cockerham, the other copresident of PFLAG Butler, said almost every meeting draws new people, who are seeking support, information or just a listening ear from people who understand what they are going through.

“We want to make sure we open it up for people to talk,” Cockerham said of the monthly meetings. “There are so many people who think they’re alone.”

Cockerham said she moved to Butler from North Dakota last year and was surprised to see that a city relatively close to Pittsburgh did not seem to have a group documenting resources for LGBT individuals.

She helped spur the June meeting at Your Parents’ Basement and was encouraged by the turnout.

“What really touched me was that 22 people showed up to that first meeting,” Cockerham said. “We all just showed up and didn’t really know what we were doing.”

Pittsburgh has a chapter of its own in PFLAG Pittsburgh, which offers support groups, a “warmline” and online community meetings. Quebedeaux said the Butler group’s founders sought some help from the Pittsburgh chapter to get the Butler chapter off the ground. People from Butler, she said, have been served by the Pittsburgh organization.

Quebedeaux also said there used to be a PFLAG chapter in Butler, but it has been inactive for a few years. While people have sought resources and support from the Pittsburgh chapter, Quebedeaux said PFLAG has many chapters in Butler-sized towns, where there may be less access to LGBT-focused resources compared to larger cities.

“We think there’s a big hunger for it, a big need for it, and it’s powerful for people to experience that there’s more people like them out there,” Quebedeaux said. “People think they’re the only ones out there and then they come to our meetings and see there are more people like them.”

Already, the Butler chapter has seen appreciation for the group’s plight. A Pride event organized in June at Alameda Park brought hundreds of people out, many of whom told Quebedeaux and Cockerham that they were glad to have a PFLAG chapter in their area.

“The events were widely attended. The picnic in Alameda had almost 300 people,” Quebedeaux said. “We were humbled by the incredibly strong turnout and businesses to see support for the queer among us.”

Now that PFLAG has organized in Butler and a board has developed its mission, the group’s next objective is to start peer support groups aimed at parents.

Quebedeaux said the group attended a training with the National Alliance on Mental Illness, or NAMI, Butler County, to be able to facilitate these support groups. She said the training was specifically meant for people to interact with parents who have LGBT children and it was more rigorous because of it.

“We have quite high requirements,” Quebedeaux said. “We’re working with NAMI to make sure the people are ready and have the necessary training. We understand these are serious topics.”

The Butler PFLAG chapter is a volunteer-run organization and its members pay dues to pay for expenses, like insurance and dues to the national PFLAG organization.

Quebedeaux emphasized that people don’t have to be paying members of PFLAG to attend its community events or even to attend its monthly business meetings. She said the meetings are open to anyone, because they could at any time have questions about a family member or friend who have “come out.”

“There’s always that worry of ‘My child just came out to me and they’re concerned that — will my child be accepted by their friends and their family?’” Quebedeaux said. “It’s for people who are less familiar with these ideas.”

Quebedeaux added that she thinks Butler gets a bad reputation for LGBT engagement because the number of people who identify in the group is not as large as it is in a place like Pittsburgh. She said it is more common to find negative comments about LGBT individuals on social media than it is just being out and about in the Butler area.

“People who are emboldened by the anonymous nature,” Quebedeaux said. “When it's face-to-face, human-to-human, the interactions are a lot better.

“No matter what background you come from, I think people are fundamentally kind in Butler.”

Having a local PFLAG chapter also adds to the visibility of LGBT individuals, who some people may simply not have been exposed to on a personal level, Quebedeaux said. She said one of the broad goals of PFLAG is to demonstrate that LGBT people have normal lives.

“It’s not an organization just for queer folks, it’s for everyone to come and understand,” Quebedeaux said. “It helps them understand that we have normal lives, normal jobs. We’re just their neighbors.”

Cockerham, too, said she has heard positive feedback on the creation of a PFLAG chapter in Butler and she hopes people who are unfamiliar with the LGBT community make contact with the group to learn more.

“It’s a passion project for everyone on the board,” Cockerham said. “I’ve had so many people approach me and say they are glad to have this in Butler.”

For more information on PFLAG Butler, visit its website at butler.pflag.org.