If you've got two melons that are the same size but one is noticeably heavier, go with the heavy one.

We've all been through it. Lugging home a huge, heavy watermelon from the store or farmers market — as perfect-looking as you could find. Then, upon slicing it open, you see your deepest fears have been realized: It's a bad melon.

It's mealy or flavorless; or worse, it has the integrity of rotted wood or has huge patches of white that make it resemble more cucumber than melon.

There are three metrics used to judge a watermelon: appearance, weight and the sound it makes when you tap it.

Look for a uniform shape and a deep green color. If the melon is too pallid or splotchy in parts, keep looking. A sunspot, or orange/yellow patch from where the melon sat in the field, is also something to look for — but not completely necessary. Some of the better melons we sampled did not have a sunspot.Are there weird bumps or lumps on the surface? Does it look a little disproportionate in spots? Not a deal breaker per se, but look for something smooth and symmetrical.

Watermelons are around 92% water. It stands to reason, therefore, that a crisp, juicy watermelon is going to weigh a lot.If you've got two melons that are the same size but one is noticeably heavier, go with the heavy one. “That's telling you the water content of the melon,” said Eric Hester of Weiser Family Farms in Tehachapi, Calif.

If you've been to any good market, you've seen people scrutinizing and tapping melons with the confidence of an expert gemologist. But it's also the most subjective of all the benchmarks: What exactly are you listening for when you tap?“You look for a nice full color, heavier and hollow-sounding,” said Carter Clary of McGrath Family Farm in Camarillo, Calif., noting that you're looking for a “lower tone” rather than something high and tight-sounding.I learned a trick from watching a video on the website of Perry & Sons farms in Manteca, Calif.: Hold a melon in one hand, palm up on the bottom of the melon. Tap firmly on the top. If it's a good one, you should be able to feel the vibration in your bottom hand. If you can't feel anything, there might be a problem.If you're looking to salvage a subpar melon, there are ways: Add a squeeze of lime and some Tajin to bring out the sweetness; make a salad with feta and mint; if you own a juicer, make a fresh juice or smoothie (watermelon-cucumber and watermelon-strawberry are good combos).And if all else fails, dump a bottle of vodka into it. Hey, it got you through college; maybe it can get you through a pandemic too.