"Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant" is sort of a "Twilight"-lite. It's about vampires and it's about teenagers. But where "Twilight" vamps down Romance Novel Road, "Freak," based on Darren Shan's novels, is a lark, and in this case, the laughs are intentional.

The movie's big drawback is that it isn't silly enough. Chris Massoglia is Darren, a good kid with good parents but a boy under the influence of the classmate his parents call "that damned Steve" (Josh Hutcherson). Steve's a class-cutting, vandalizing punk who leads Darren away from "the path to a happy, productive life," or so the parents warn.

Darren should have listened, because when a strange Euro-limo passes through town dropping flyers for "The world's greatest freak show," Steve insists they go. And mixed up with the bearded lady (Salma Hayek) and Alexander Ribs (Orlando Jones), there's a real live vampire. Steve recognizes Larten Crepsley (a well-cast John C. Reilly) from his vampire books and is anxious to escape his miserable life by joining the undead. But the guy whose "destiny" it is to join the vampires in their war with the murderous Vampanese, led by Michael Cerveris from TV's "Fringe," is Darren.

Director Paul Weitz and writer Brian Helgeland go for something like a "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" goof on teens dealing with issues of eternal life/eternal damnation, but the dialogue lacks the wit of the visuals.

But despite some amusing scenes and "rules" for this vampire world, the script never sinks its teeth into the "Cirque" freaks and never once works up a decent fright. This "Assistant" could use more on-the-job training.