My name is Sara. I'm 18 years old. I'm pregnant and in school in the 11th grade.I was asked to write this by a wonderful person. I thought I couldn't pass this up if it meant that I might help someone else.What I was asked to write about was: How have drugs and alcohol affected my life? What am I like now? What have I lost?First, I want to start by saying that drugs and alcohol ruined my life. I've done a lot of crazy things and made horrible decisions. Honestly, I didn't know what was going on.Where I am now is pregnant with a little bit of clean time and some relapses. I fight every day for another day clean. It's not easy!I've had a good amount of clean time, but things got rough. You just have to keep your head up.

During my using, I've lost a lot of things that meant a lot to me.Even though some of these things weren't my fault, they are all still lost. I lost all of my friends, I do not speak to any of them hardly, my family's trust, and I lost some close family down that path.There is so much that I want to do with my life. I'm really scared!I have a daughter coming in January who I'm not ready for. But, I want to finish school, get a good job, take care of her, and be the best mother I can be.I want to make sure she doesn't turn out like me because her father isn't around. Yes, he knows, but he is just as scared so he doesn't talk to me. He has his own life, which doesn't bother me.Dealing with an addiction during pregnancy isn't the greatest thing. It's a fight every day, and using drugs while you are pregnant is real and it's scary!Women who are pregnant get help. It's not the child's fault.By the grace of God, my relapses haven't given me any complications, and so far the baby is healthy.

I've come to realize that it is not all about me anymore. I have a daughter to take care of.There are going to be some major changes or I could lose my daughter. Yes, that is real too!I don't want my child to grow up not knowing her parents because I really didn't have much of a childhood. I had to grow up too fast. I want her to grow up right on time.Because I am involved in school, counseling, and meetings (yes, those are all real and work too!), I think that I should be strong enough to make it in the future.As long as I have God, I can do anything, and so can you.Remember, there's help out there. Speak out and ask!

Sara from Butler County