There's nothing like the weekend.

You can sit back, put your feet up, grab the remote with one hand and a cold beverage with the other and watch sports.

All day.

All night.

Until you can close your eyes and see visions of teen golfer Tadd Fujikawa dancing, sinking putts and pumping his fist.

Before you know it, though, the weekend is over and the only sporting event you can catch is the World Series of Poker.

Watching people lose thousands of dollars in Las Vegas is something you do before you hit the all-you-can-eat seafood buffet with your last 10 bucks. It's not a sport.

There is some good news.

After a weekend like the last one, crammed to the rim with sporting events and news, you need some time to reflect.

• Watching the Fumble, Part Dieux, made me feel bad for Marty Chokenheimer, er, Schottenheimer.

Then he decided to challenge it, and I stopped feeling bad for him and started wondering whether or not he was dropped on his head excessively as a child.

He's now 5-13 in playoff games. He makes Tony Dungy look like Vince Lombardi.

• Every 10 seconds, someone declares for the NFL draft.

• LaDainian Tomlinson shouldn't be mad at the Patriots for dancing on the Chargers' logo at midfield.

L.T. should be mad at the dude who painted the logo on the field.

If there were no logos painted at midfield, no one could dance on them.

• Someone just declared for the NFL draft.

• Is it me, or does Vinny Testaverde resemble Joey Buttafucho more and more each year?

• I got the bottle of Jolt I'm drinking to help me write this column from fellow Eagle sports reporter Derek Pyda's locker.

• I'd like to release a statement. "Derek Pyda did not give me anything whatsoever and has nothing to do with this matter, contrary to recent reports."

• The Bulls went on a 111-66 run over the first 48 minutes of their NBA game with the Grizzlies Saturday night. Somewhere hibernating bears are rolling over in disgust.

Somewhere Dennis Green is yelling, "The Grizzlies were who we thought they were!"

• Someone just declared for the NFL draft.

• David Beckham will play soccer in Los Angeles next season.

Beckham in L.A.? Good news, Lindsay Lohan. You have a new drinking buddy!

They will star together in a new movie called, "Going on a bender like Beckham."

• Michael Strahan must pay his ex-wife $15.3 million.

Nice pre-nup, Strahan? Who negotiated it? The caveman from the Geico TV commercial?

• Someone just declared for the NFL draft.

• That ticking sound is coming from the Colts defense. It's just a matter of time before it coughs up about a billion yards.

• Tadd Fujikawa is my new hero. Sorry Michelle Wie. He's one foot shorter than you, but he makes fewer bogies.

• Michelle Wie just declared for the NFL draft.