Football season is back.

For me, that means following Butler wherever the Golden Tornado touches down each Friday night, doing the same with Slippery Rock University on Saturdays and turning from football writer to football fan while watching the Steelers on Sundays.

My football weekend doesn't end there, however.

There's always the Monday night war in my household.

John vs. Darlene. "Monday Night Football" vs. alternative programming.

Contrary to standard belief, my wife is in the "Monday Night Football" corner. My Monday night allegiance lies with "Monday Night Raw," the live two-hour professional wrestling show.

Yeah, yeah, wrestling's fake, got all that, no need to go there.

But World Wrestling Entertainment, better known as WWE, is entertaining to me and serves as my weekly two-hour escape from reality.

It's hard to give that up, even for football.

But when it comes to the NFL, my wife lives for it.

If the Atlanta Falcons were to kick off against the San Francisco 49ers at 10 a.m., both teams combining to sport a 2-17 record at the time, Darlene would be glued to the TVset in anticipation of seeing something special.

Christmas comes twice a year to her — on Dec. 25 and on the first Sunday of the NFL's regular season.

She mocks baseball season and makes fun of my allegiance to the Pirates. She even understands my choosing wrestling for summer viewing.

But watching wrestling over the NFL? In her eyes, I'm an idiot.

But after three days of hearing shoulder pads collide and pigskins being booted around, I need something else come Monday.

So, I confess. A tag team match in which one guy is guaranteed to be ganged up on by two others while the referee's attention is diverted is more compelling theater to me than whether the Green Bay Packers can win with Aaron Rodgers at quarterback.

Darlene doesn't understand this. "It's fake,"she points out. "It's not real. It's just a show."

All true, but pro football is a show as well. And, yes, the games are real and the winner is not predetermined — though in this day and age, who knows for sure. Maybe there's a Tim Donaghy overseeing some of these games.

Just kidding, football junkies. The NFLis legit. Even though pro wrestling isn't, I don't know who's going to win the WWEmatches, even though the wrestlers do.

So, really, where's the difference?

Darlene can't get enough football.

By Monday night, though, I'm ready for bodyslams and chair shots, having seen enough sacks and touchdown dances.

True harmony in a marriage means compromise, understanding, giving up one's own preferred vices so one's spouse can enjoy hers.

Peace in the household comes from mutual respect and the ability to work together to overcome even the most severe of disagreements.

The real solution means having two TVs.

Make that three. My mother-in-law lives with us, too.