Who knew that Paris Hilton had an energy policy?

And, you know what? It ain't bad.

Republican presidential candidate John McCain got this odd ball rolling. One of his campaign ads juxtaposed the heiress and Hollywood hottie Hilton's image with fellow paparazzi magnet Britney Spears to mock Democratic candidate Barack Obama's fame and energy policy. This, my friends, is why pre-election summer is often called the "silly season."

Things seemed to get sillier as Paris struck back with an Internet ad cheerfully aimed at the "wrinkly white-haired guy." The skinny blonde-haired cutie introduces her own energy policy clad in a bikini at poolside.

Bless you, child. Just when mine eyes were glazing over with presidential petroleum debates, along comes Hilton to give policy wonks something to gape at besides oil rigs.

Since she's appearing in a presidential campaign ad, she reasons, that must mean she is running for president, too. So says the woman who has done for the catchphrase "That's hot" what Gary Coleman on "Diff'rent Strokes" did for "Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis?"

But can she reduce our dependency on foreign oil?

Paris' plan goes like this: "Barack wants to focus on new technologies to cut foreign-oil dependency, and McCain wants offshore drilling," she chirps. "Well, why don't we do a hybrid of both candidates' ideas?"

OK. I'm with you so far, Paris.

"We can do limited offshore drilling with strict environmental oversight, while creating tax incentives to get Detroit making hybrid and electric cars."

Keep talking. I'm listening.

"That way the offshore drilling carries us until the new technologies kick in, which will then create new jobs and energy independence. Energy crisis solved."

Gotcha. Sure, she didn't really write the copy for the video. But she did memorize it. And, unlike most of her earlier acting ventures, she actually delivers her two-minute script with charm and talent.

Paris is, "like, totally ready to lead," she says, and I am, like, totally impressed. Almost.

Her bring-us-together approach offers hope of a real energy compromise that blends the best of what McCain and Obama offer — as both have moved closer to each other than either seems to be willing to admit.

Unfortunately, Paris' spot does not have time to detail how she would pay for those tax incentives.

I would suggest, whether at poolside or not, that a more efficient way to spur the production of fuel-efficient cars is what we are seeing now: let oil and gas prices float freely up or down according to demand.

Don't faint. It has only been during times of national panic over rising fuel prices that Detroit gets serious about fuel-efficient cars. We saw that back in the fuel shortages of the 1970s and we are seeing it again this year.

We need a comprehensive approach to reducing energy costs. We can't reduce our oil dependency by simply reducing the price of gasoline at the pump any more than we can reduce drug addiction by reducing the price of heroin.

Now that Ms. Paris is throwing her bonnet in the ring ("See you at the debates, bitches," she signs off with a big smile), I hope that McCain and Obama will take her up on her challenge invitation. Invite her to join their debates. I guarantee that the events will be well covered.

Clarence Page is a Chicago Tribune columnist.